Why Be Kind To One Another: Kindness Pays

There are many reasons why we want to be kind to one another in the various aspects of our life.

They include our family, colleagues and strangers.

It can not only change the lives of the people we have helped, but also literally change ours as well, health wise.

The graphic above shows some of the amazing scientific benefits of kindness that you probably didn’t know about.

In a nutshell, being kind to one another may actually increase our lifespan.

Why is this so?

How An Act Of Kindness Impacts The Various Parties

An act of kindness occurs in situations where somebody is in need of help.

He is unable to help himself, or he is unable to help himself in time, or he is unaware that he needs help.

The helper gains satisfaction and joy in seeing the person needing help get better in some small or big way.

The person needing help and is helped will feel thankful and grateful to the helper for solving his problem. This reduces his distress and stress levels significantly.

It follows that witnesses to the act of kindness also experience what those 2 parties are experiencing. This is probably because they think they may be able to play the role of the helper and make a difference, or they could also be the person needing help who then gets the help.

All the 3 parties to an act of kindness will experience happiness.

In the presence of a good deed done by one person to another, our brain produces the chemicals that make us feel the joy, or reduces the chemicals that make us sad or stressed out.

And an increase in our lifespan may be the end result!

Witness Someone Being Kind To Another – And Notice How You Feel

Check out the video below.

You are a witness to the unquestionably talented artist who is sketching the people in front of him in the subway, and then giving the art away to them as a gift.

Be honest now. How did you feel when you saw that act of kindness?

How are you feeling now, after the video has ended?

How will you be feeling later, as you think back on what you have seen?

Note that all 3 parties feel similarly, to varying degrees.

Here’s the science behind what we are feeling — and how they are making us healthier!

Doing Acts Of Kindness Releases The DOSE Of Happiness

The 4 major chemicals released in our brain when we are happy are Dopamine, Oxytocin, Serotonin and Endorphins (“DOSE”).

Dopamine is released in our brain when we have achieved a goal set.

Helping someone is a goal – and once we have done it, we feel immense satisfaction. This feeling is compounded when the person being helped expresses his gratitude and happiness for the help.

Dopamine is also called “Helper’s High” for this reason.

Oxytocin is released when we bond with somebody.

The act of helping another promotes this bond and we feel closer to them as a result. It also increases our self-esteem, reduces stress and plays a role in the health of our heart.

Serotonin makes us happier, calmer and more focused.

Low levels of it has been associated with depression.

It also regulates our sleep and digestion, as well as the health of our bones.

Endorphins are our body’s natural painkillers.

They help alleviate any pain we may have and maximise pleasure from an activity that is important to our survival.

This includes helping someone else who is in distress or pain. Endorphins enable us to continue providing the help even when we also experience some pain and discomfort in doing so.

Endorphins also help alleviate depression and reduce stress and anxiety, as well as give us confidence and help us to sleep better.

We get the full DOSE of Happiness by simply doing kind acts for others!

Here Are Some Easy Ways For Us To Be Kind To One Another

For us to have all the health benefits from being kind, we must do random acts of kindness regularly to make a difference in the lives of those we are helping.

Helping somebody just one time will give us a buzz of satisfaction, due to the release of the brain chemicals above. But it will quickly fade, along with all the benefits we get from them.

As such we have to follow up one act of kindness with more over a period of time so that we are in a state of happiness for the long term.

The best way to do this is to simply be kind to everybody, and make it a part of our routine for the rest of our lives.

Fortunately there are a couple of easy ways that we can do this.

Be Kind To One Another: Volunteer For A Cause

volunteers live longer

Being a volunteer for a cause involves multiple factors that enhance our wellbeing.

Depending on our roles, we may be exercising by moving a lot, perhaps shifting things around, walking to some place, or preparing meals in a group.

Exercise also releases endorphins, dopamine and serotonin — all of which provide the benefits stated above.

Group activities with other volunteers also promote the release of oxytocin which increases our bond with them, as does meeting the people the volunteering is meant to benefit.

Supporting a cause that is meaningful to us will again release serotonin which gives us the confidence to meet it.

As such, you can see that the multiple benefits from volunteering for a cause we believe in would appear to feed on themselves, which gives us even more satisfaction and joy, reduces our stress and makes us calmer.

Simply find a cause you can volunteer for and make the time for its activities every week if you can.

If you want to volunteer to help BeepBeep Nation out, simply become one of our supporters here.

Be Kind To One Another: Make A To-Do List

We can also make a list of some acts of kindness we can do for anyone, starting today.

And then we simply do the acts everyday, checking each one off as we go along, and knowing that whoever we are helping everyday will be better off than before we did anything for them.

This will take some time and effort especially when we have never done it systematically before.

But it will be truly worth our effort, and not every act of kindness requires a lot of time.

Sometimes a simple phone call to talk to somebody for a few minutes is enough to make a difference.

Other times you may be just dropping some stuff off for the person you’re helping and you’re done.

There are 2 ways to make a list of things to do:

We can either:

1. Think of a list of acts of kindness that we can do for anybody — be they strangers or people we know

You can simply use your phone’s task app to type in your list of acts of kindness for someone you know, or some stranger.

Then simply check off each one as you do it, when you can. Keep adding to it as you go along and pretty soon you’ll be doing it everyday.

2. We can wait for others to ask us to help and then offer our help to them, if we can indeed help them.

This second option has the advantage in that the help is tailored to what the requestor for help actually wanted help with.

We are not guessing, so the results will be better for the requestor. The list is automatically created for us to check out.

We then offer the help if we can. Otherwise we can just skip to the next request.

Because the same request is being seen by other users of the app within the vicinity of the requestor, other people may be able to help when we cannot.

In fact, the more users there are for the app, the more help offers a requestor will get, thus ensuring as many people as possible get the help they need.

Kindness Pays

BeepBeep Nation aims to get the majority of people in the world to help another as much as they can, as regularly as they can.

Apart from the health benefits to ourselves when we help others, we are also changing the lives of those needing help but can’t access help easily.

The end result is a kinder, better world for everybody even as we all get healthier at the same time.

There are many other positive side effects from practising kindness. BeepBeep Nation will facilitate this, and in the process, create amazing values for the world that don’t currently exist!

The BeepBeep Nation app which is being developed currently (with some awesome help from our supporters) can do this and much, much more!

If you would like to be one of our supporters, simply click here and let us know.

Idealist vs Realist – Which Is Best For Kindness?

Is it better to be an idealist vs a realist?

Time and time again, this age-old debate resurfaces among a group of friends, possibly during a night out for cocktails when someone shares his current career or relationship problems.

Surely at least one friend will emerge as the former and another will appear to be the latter. But sometimes a few of you will be confused as to how you have decided to look at life so far.

As a businesswoman, I have long ago come to terms with the fact that I need to be both, in order to deal with the life path I have chosen for myself.

Another path that necessitates the destruction of the either/or mentality when it comes to being an idealist vs realist is learning compassion.

To live a fruitful life of being kind to others and sharing your life with them, one must learn to be both.

I know seems like a contradiction. But first, let’s inspect what those terms generally mean to people.

Idealist vs Realist: Definitions

Here’s the definition of an Idealist in the Merriam-Webster dictionary:

The second definition of idealist applies to a person with a certain perspective or way of life.

Defined as “one guided by ideals” or “one that places ideals before practical considerations,” people who live by idealism probably aim to see things in a perfect light.

Often also dubbed as dreamers, visionaries and positive thinkers, idealists value noble principles and set high goals for themselves.

This often means that they tend towards optimism.

However, there’s also a misconception that idealists are naive, innocent, and wishful thinkers.

That doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing.

They only hope for a better future and live life according to that hope, which means that the big picture is very important to them.

However, by focusing on the big picture, they sometimes get ahead of themselves and forget to consider other important factors in a given situation. 

Now let’s contrast these traits with how a realistic person is described.

Here’s the definition of a Realist by Merriam-Webster:

While idealists focus on “what could be,” realists tend to look at “what actually is.”

They like to adopt a practical or pragmatic view of circumstances, which leads them to make safe and rational choices.

Sometimes, they tend towards cynicism or pessimism, but again, that’s not necessarily the case.

They just like to process particular aspects of a certain situation and carefully scrutinize the truth.

Instead of looking at the big picture of a better future, realists tend to break it down into components and set smaller, more achievable goals.

Sometimes, this tendency hinders them from taking risks and makes them settle with what they’re immediately given.

By focusing on the present, they may sometimes miss out on big possibilities.

In Creating A Kinder World, Which Mindset Is Better?

Now you may notice that both mindsets actually seem to need each other.

The debate for whether you’re an idealist or realist seems futile when you see the holes in either perspective.

For instance, an idealist may have high hopes towards a huge goal, but he is not equipped with enough focus to actually lay out steps on how to achieve that.

Meanwhile, a realist may have the analytic skills, but he doesn’t have any purpose so those skills just end up as unused potential.

When we stop thinking of whether we’re an idealist or realist and instead shift the conversation to how we should be the best of both, we start seeing that there’s so much more we can do.

An idealist perhaps wants to change the world and make a brighter future for everyone, a vision that is very helpful in our times, but nevertheless just a vision.

A realist can introduce practical ways on how to make that vision happen and sustain it, turning an idealistic hope into purposeful action.

To create a kinder, better world, you need to be both an idealist and a realist.

BeepBeep Nation: Kindness Pays

The BeepBeep Nation app encourages the idealist and the realist in everyone by enabling its users to regularly do kind acts and eventually invest deeper in a broader culture of kindness.

It provides a platform to connect people who need help and others who can provide that help, fostering new and healthy relationships or networks.

As such, not only does it promote an attitude and culture of helping each other out, it also makes way for a whole new level of face-to-face human interaction.

Aiming to build trust among individuals, BeepBeep Nation convinces the idealist in you that a brighter future or a better world is possible, and it urges the realist in you to start acting on that picture.

Now you no longer have to choose between being an idealist or realist; BeepBeep Nation offers some truly exciting ways to develop a healthy mindset that embraces both.

The BeepBeep Nation app is in its final stages of development. To be one of our supporters and be a part of our vision to make the world a better, kinder place, simply click here and let us know.

Treat People With Kindness In Your Career

There are an endless number of ways to treat people with kindness.

You can run a restaurant for the poor or raise money for children with disabilities.

When it comes to helping others, it doesn’t matter if you’re poor, middle class or part of the 1%.

You can be a total busybody and still give back by using your career as a means of benefitting others. 

Even better, there is evidence to show that being kind as part of your career will provide you with more benefits in your career itself. This is in addition to the benefits others will get from you.

Here’s how you can use your job to treat people with kindness

If you are a university student, fearing that your future occupation may be a selfish one is completely natural.

After all, being a creative writer or interior designer may seem, in a way, limited.

This is far from true, as many jobs can be platforms for sharing knowledge and information with others.

If you are a chef, you can use your expertise to educate other aspiring chefs, whether this means charging for a workshop or doing it for free.

Offering your services pro bono is another awesome way to do good. It may not profit you financially, but giving others a means to learn without expecting anything from them may bring you joy that you otherwise would not get. 

Reach out to charitable institutions and figure out where you can be an asset.

Who knows? You may be part of the success story of an aspiring engineer.

If you’re unsure of how your job can help others directly, use it to advocate for something.

If you’re a graphic designer promoting mental health, make a beautiful, informative and accurate infographic to educate the public so that they can understand it better.

If it’s truly useful, it can be shared all over social media. This will result in many more people with mental health issues be recognised and offered help. 

If you’re a meat farmer, you may want to start implementing the various ways to make farming more humane for the animals.

Somehow, things always fall into place, even when partnerships seem odd.

There are so many different ways to treat people with kindness.

Social media and Google can give you all the resources you need to be innovative and creative.

If you are fairly established in the working world, a sensible option would be to earn to give.

Figure out how much of your salary you can set aside for a cause you are truly passionate about.

Decide whether you are financially stable enough to commit to a charity for a certain amount of time.

Do research to ensure that your money is being distributed fairly and doing exactly what it is meant to.

Of course, sticking to a group will require some involvement. So engage with your charity every now and then via visits or volunteer to participate in their activities.

If you are not yet in the above category, you can still help treat people with kindness with your time and effort. 

If you feel your job should be directly involved with a cause, don’t hesitate to seek employment with charities or social enterprises, or even start one from scratch.

This way, you can make helping others your career. 

This is exactly what the founders of BeepBeep Nation do. It’s a social enterprise with the goal of enabling those in need to get help and those who can help to offer it, 24/7 all over the world.

You can also help BeepBeep Nation in its mission by becoming one of its supporters. There are a myriad of things to do, and you may be able to help out in some way. 

Simply click here and see how you can be a part of BeepBeep Nation’s vision of a kinder, better world.

In any case, decide where you think you can be most useful in and what problems are most urgent to you that are not being addressed by any entity. You can then present your solution and attract volunteers or people with the same intention and work towards it.  

If you are great with computers, you can opt to do research regarding statistics or patterns that may be of use to those needing the data but can’t afford to hire a specialist to get them.

Perhaps you’re a fearless public speaker who is the best person to promote your own cause. You will need to master social media so that your message can reach many more people than just those within your proximity.

But mastering them will also benefit your main career at the same time. So you’re really maximising your efforts for both your career and your good cause. 

If you have the passion, your energy will come out of nowhere.  Chances are that you’ll find your place within whatever field of work you choose.

Picking out the perfect job may be a case of what earns the most or what line of work your family is in. But keep in mind that it is also about your personal desires and strengths, as well as its potential to impact others.

This makes your job a good way to both earn your keep and make a huge difference in your community and the world – irrespective of how small you think your contributions may be. 

Every little act of kindness for anybody done over a long period of time will add up. Collectively, they will not only benefit the recipients of your help, but also inspire some of them to do likewise for their own community and over time, the entire world.  

Volunteer Benefits – The Science

There are many benefits for volunteers. Here's the science behind compassion.

A volunteer benefits from doing their share in alleviating the suffering of their fellow human beings.

We frequently showcase this kind of stories — of people with exemplary acts of devotion and compassion or even people who do random little acts of kindness in their everyday lives.

Some people who enjoy helping out tend to do so for religious or spiritual reasons.

And whether it’s Buddhism, Christianity, Islam, or others, the religions of the world do have discourses of compassion.

Though I myself have always been curious about a different but equally important aspect of this human tendency: is there a science behind this?

volunteer benefits from psychologically and physiologically when doing good deeds.

I’m glad to report: yep, there is.

A study done by experimental social psychologists tested how the experience of compassion affected people’s behavior.

First, participants were told that they were supposedly part of an experiment about mathematical ability and taste perception.

Ostensibly, these were the instructions: participants were supposed to solve as much as they can of 20 math problems, in which they would receive 50 cents for each problem they solved correctly.

After being checked and getting paid, they would proceed to the taste perception phase. Here, participants were asked to prepare taste samples for each other by pouring extra-hot hot sauce.

It seems absurd, but here’s the catch.

The experimenters hired confederates to pretend to be fake participants.

Let’s call the first one Dan and the second Hannah. In one version of the experiment, Dan was asked to cheat badly and very obviously on the math problems, so that the real participants would see.

Afterwards, in the taste perception phase, the experimenters noticed that the real participants poured bigger servings of hot sauce to Dan the Cheater.

But doesn’t this show revenge instead of compassion?

experiment to see the effects of compassion on volunteers.

Well, in another version, Dan the Cheater was asked to do the same thing but now Hannah was gonna play a role.

Before the taste perception phase, Hannah would cry and the experimenters would ask why.

She’d say she recently found out about her brother’s terminal illness. Increasingly emotional, Hannah asked to be excused from the experiment.

In this version, even though the participants still witnessed Dan cheating, they did not pour bigger amounts of hot sauce in the taste perception phase.

What does this show?

First, the compassion that the participants felt predicted how much hot sauce they were going to give to another person.

And second, more importantly, the compassion that people feel towards one person can predict how they will act towards others.

This experiment is only one of many studies that are now delving into the idea and reality of compassion.

Recently, a conference has even been held to discuss it, joined by representatives from different fields such as evolutionary psychologists, clinical psychologists who deal with children suffering from trauma, charity owners who conduct social and emotional skills workshops for the youth, and others.

brain scans to determine the different states in the brain that correspond to compassion.

Using brain scans, one doctor even explained how different parts of the brain are activated when people are in a “compassionate state” or “non-compassionate state.”

So interestingly enough, compassion actually seems to have physiological, neurological effects.

A volunteer benefits both his body and mind.

But now here’s the thing. My personal epiphany, if you will.

We can participate in all these discussions, conduct our own experiments if we’re in the field, compile all these data, but maybe it’ll be a bit more exciting to see for ourselves.

There’s all this science about compassion, we know that. But somehow I think the reality of compassion can’t be proven by numbers.

Tall order but maybe here’s what we can do: go out there, help people out, and prove it for ourselves.

Help people out and reap the benefits as a volunteer.

If you are interested in reading more scientific information about kindness or compassion, here’s a list of various quantitative and qualitative studies about the topic.

Then again, if you are more keen to join the action, check out the upcoming BeepBeep Nation app. You might be surprised at the many ways you’ll see how compassion exists.